Death is something everyone experiences in their lives. The pain and sorrow that death brings are never easy to cope with. We are shaken when someone we know passes away, and this is only amplified when we are close to the person. How can we trust that God is still good even when he takes away the person we are closest to; our spouse?
In our world, life is fleeting and death is a grim reality. The way God designed us makes death feel unnatural; we were meant to live. Yet death is a path we all must eventually take, and we expect it in its due time. However, when this reality happens unexpectedly, involving someone close to us, it can feel as though we are drowning in our grief.
“Heal me, Lord…I am worn out from my groaning. All night long I flood my bed with weeping and drench my couch with tears” -Psalm 6:2, 6
Ashley Davidson lost her husband suddenly. It didn’t make sense. He loved God passionately and was always seeking to share the gospel with others. He was a loving husband and a father to 3 children. Why would God take him away?
“I remember the Lord saying, ‘You can’t, but I can.’” -Ashley
A Unique Grief
No one else can understand the specific love you and your spouse share. The way you met, the depths of love you felt for each other, and the dynamics of your relationship are woven together in an experience that is different from any other relationship on the planet.
There are many painful emotions you face and adding to the pain is the fact that well-meaning friends do not fully understand the pain you have. You may experience confusion, hurt, loneliness, abandonment, regret, guilt, and anger amid this tragedy. If God is good, why would he allow this to happen?
Your grief may be unique, but you are not alone in it. Throughout Scripture, we see that people have both grieved and questioned God’s goodness in the midst of severe loss.
The Psalmist questions God saying, “Why, O Lord, do you stand far away? Why do you hide yourself in times of trouble?” (Psalm 10) and, “How long must I wrestle with my thoughts and day after day have sorrow in my heart?” (Psalm 13:2). Jesus himself wept over the death of his dear friend Lazarus (John 11:35).
God invites you to ask him questions when you lose a loved one. But God doesn’t always answer them. What he does is give us something greater than answers: he gives us himself.
Because Jesus overcame death, we have an everlasting hope.
Not only did Jesus overcome death when he was resurrected, but he also abolished death and brought life (1 Timothy 1:10). We now have a hope that one day there will be no more death, mourning, crying, or pain because God is making everything new (Revelation 21).
God gifts us with this hope that is far beyond anything that this world can offer. Jesus’ presence is worth more than anything and the sight of God’s glory will leave no one unsatisfied. The hole that is left in your life because of the loss of your loved one will be filled by God.
This hope doesn’t make grieving easy and you may still question why this happened. Yet we do not grieve like the rest of the world does because we have hope. God will never leave you nor forsake you, especially in your darkest and most painful moments.
“God is who he says he is, and that is good and love.” -Ashley
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